Everyone talks about making the jump. The big change. But what is often missed in these stories is the freefall, that period of limbo between making the decision to do something and landing in your new world. The freefall after a parachute jump (I have heard) is actually the most ecstasy-inducing experience. The fear of the jump is over and for those blissful few moments, you float in another world between one and the next.
For lease!
That’s sort of where we are right now. On Tuesday I gathered up the courage to approach my supervisor and tell him that we are moving. That my last day at work will be September 20. Like climbing the ladder to the jump off the high dive, I noticed that my fear was in the build-up. Once I had done it, I was falling into a whole new experience. One where I know I will be safe and the fun is still to come.
Kitty knows how to relax 🙂
In just this first week that Britton has been off work we have accomplished a lot! Britton took Kitty in for his check-up and shots (the first time in about 9 years!!). We have thoroughly cleaned out the whole house, signed the paperwork to get it placed for rent, and had our first showing! And we have begun looking at airfare to buy our tickets. As for “stuff”, we are down to just two chairs and the TV. We have dropped off two more large trash bags full of clothes and things to Goodwill. And our folks have graciously held on to some of our sentimental items like photo albums. We have even sold our kitchen table and are using a card table to eat.
Bye kitchen table of 10 years!
It is a strange place, the freefall. The transition. At work, they are already talking about hiring my position and it makes me feel strange. I think it must be that for eight years, this job has been tied up in my identity. It is how I have introduced myself many times. My little niche in the world. And just like that I can be replaced. It also brings up feelings of loss and loss-aversion. I am going to miss all my co-workers, friends and family. And we are basically taking a 90% paycut to live our dream. But when you put it into perspective, when you have what you need, when you have ENOUGH, it is by far more expensive to continue to just wish you were living the dream instead of actually doing it.
Britton said he felt this way too his last few weeks at work, but that once he was done and had walked away, the world has now opened up into this new space of creation. He feels anything is possible. It is pretty cool and weird to have a nearly empty house, and an empty yard now that the chickens have a new home as well.
Chickens loaded up to go to their new home
But every time there is emptiness or vacancy, every time there is a blank canvas, there is the power to fill, the power to create. No void or vacuum ever stays that way for long. And so when we land from this freefall, we will look around and say: What a trip!
And where do we start.
